I Have Nothing
by PiXiE-LiCiOuS
Summary: ['I was determined to get inside Kate's head, to find out what really went on. I wanted to help her... But I never thought that would mean losing her forever.'] Set in 6th Grade
1. Introduction

I Have Nothing  
  
Introduction  
  
Isn't it funny how in most friendship groups, there's always special friends; the ones who you'd die for. And the ones who don't even come as close to that. You wouldn't even embarrass yourself for them.  
  
I never liked Kate that much. Not as much as Miranda and Gordo anyway. Miranda was the one I could always go to for girly talks, to talk about boys that we liked at the time, stuff like that. Gordo was always the advice guy. He had a solution for everything. And then there was Kate.  
  
She was nowhere. She didn't fit into any categories. I couldn't open up to her like I could the others. And Miranda and Gordo found it hard to talk to her too.  
  
I felt bad for Kate. I mean, I don't think me, Miranda and Gordo were the only ones who felt the tension. Kate must have known she was out of place. You could see it in her face. Everytime she looked at us, it was like there was hurt and loneliness in there somewhere. Like it was painful for her to look at us.  
  
Deep down she knew she didn't belong.   
  
But we kept her anyway. Kate was our friend, and we couldn't just desert her. She deserved more than that. She was a good person. She did her homework, she was always nice, she never fought with her parents, she ate her vegetables.  
  
So how could someone that was so nice sometimes come across so different? Kate didn't put herself out there for us. How were we meant to talk to her if she was that way?  
  
If she wanted to be able to talk to us about stuff, then she'd have to open up too. I could see there was a lot of things she had to say. For her though, forming the words was the problem. I was determined to get inside Kate's head, to find out what really went on. I wanted to help her.  
  
But I never thought that would mean losing her forever. 


	2. Chapter One: Being Naive

I Have Nothing  
  
Chapter One  
  
"Hey Kate," She looked up from her homework and smiled.  
  
"Hi Lizzie."  
  
"Amy said to just come up." I said, sitting on the edge of Kate's bed.  
  
Amy was Kate's older cousin. She was sixteen and had just quit school. She looked after Kate when her parents were away, which was most the time.  
  
She nodded, then closed her Maths book and turned to face me.  
  
"So what's up?"  
  
I shrugged, "Nothing really, I've been so bored today!"  
  
"Same," Kate agreed.  
  
We heard the front door open downstairs and her parents arriving home from their most recent business trip.  
  
"Kate, Amy!" Her Mum called.  
  
Kate sighed, getting up and signalling me to follow her downstairs.  
  
The moment Kate's eyes landed on her mother, she smiled, looking as though she'd forgotten this was the woman who she had told us on numerous occasions she hated, and the woman who was never home, the woman who Kate said couldn't care less about her.  
  
But for a moment, all was forgiven and forgotten, and Kate embraced her.  
  
"Kate, honey, I've missed you." Her Mum gave her a sweet smile, which Kate returned.  
  
"I missed you too, Mum."  
  
The two caught up for a few minutes, and then me and Kate wandered back upstairs to her room.  
  
"I can't believe her," Kate muttered.  
  
I scrunched up my face, "What do you mean? You looked so happy to see her."  
  
"Looks can be deceiving," Kate rolled her eyes, "Just like anyone who looked at her would think she was actually a half decent Mum."  
  
I shrugged, "Maybe you should give her a break."  
  
Kate looked at me sadly, "I wouldn't expect you to understand Lizzie."  
  
I can't believe she just said that! I mean, I'm a VERY understanding person. How would she know? I wished for the hundredth time in my life I had the nerve to stick up to Kate.  
  
"I guess," I replied slowly.  
  
"Look, don't take this the wrong way Liz, but I think you're a little naïve for this kind of situation."  
  
Kate was always using big words and making out she was the oldest, most mature out of the bunch of us. I knew it wasn't true. Kate was probably the most immature. I didn't say anything back of course; I didn't even know what naïve meant.  
  
I sat there for another fifteen minutes, listening to Kate tell me just how horrible her Mother was, then made up an excuse to leave.  
  
I got home about twenty minutes later, and went straight into the kitchen, where Mum was sitting, making Chicken Noodle Casserole. I hated that stuff.  
  
"Are we having that for tea?" I tried to look happy, but the horrible stench was a little too much.  
  
"Sure are," Mum smiled, "How was Kate?"  
  
"Fine," I sat down at the kitchen table.  
  
I sighed, "Mum, do you think I'm naïve?"  
  
She laughed, and then shook her head. "Of course not, sweetie. What on earth gave you that idea?"  
  
"Nothing." I lied.  
  
I didn't ask what it meant; I didn't want to sound stupid. I trudged upstairs and rang Gordo.  
  
"Gordo, what does naïve mean?"  
  
"Umm... it's kind of like childish. Why?"  
  
"Kate called me naïve." I replied.  
  
Gordo laughed, "Kate doesn't know what she's talking about.  
  
"Maybe I am a little naïve," I tried to reason with Kate, I don't know why.  
  
"Lizzie, you need to stick up for yourself." Gordo said.  
  
"But I do!" I replied, not very convincingly.  
  
Gordo snorted, "Lizzie, please, you're probably the only person I know who's so afraid of confrontation."  
  
I sighed, then replied in a little voice, "I don't mean to be."  
  
"Don't let it get you down. It's not that bigger deal."  
  
"But it is! I want to stand up to Kate, I really do. She's just so."  
  
"Scary?"  
  
"Powerful." I said.  
  
"She is?"  
  
"In our group, yeah."  
  
"I thought you guys were getting along great?" Gordo asked.  
  
"We are. We're just on different levels most the time."  
  
"I get what you mean," Gordo replied, "Me and Miranda can be a bit like that sometimes."  
  
"But you and me aren't like that." I said.  
  
Gordo laughed, "That's because we've known each other all our lives. We're too alike I guess."  
  
"Is that a good thing?"  
  
I didn't know if it was or not. I guess it could slide both ways.  
  
"Well, I think it is."  
  
I hung up after speaking to Gordo for another hour. I sat on my bed, looking out the window.  
  
The lawn was covered in brown, orange and yellow leaves. Fall was coming to an end, and winter was only just around the corner.  
  
I stared out the window for what seemed like forever trying to think up ways to stand up to Kate. By the time I was called downstairs for dinner, I had a sketchy idea in my head of what I was going to say to her. 


End file.
